learning – Page 4 – LEARN AS YOU LIVE

The importance of experiencing how it feels to be alone.

Post 17

Now before I get started understand I’m willing to receive a lot of hate in order to defend what I’m fond of , respect me for it ! At least I’ll burn with integrity.

You may call it loneliness but I see it as “Developing Independence”.

I use to think it was kind of pathetic that I didn’t experience the whole dating in middle school or throughout high school but I think I saved myself a lot of grief. I became okay with the possibility of me being alone because it was all I was use to. Now that I’m out of school, adulting, I notice how many people have ridiculous self esteem issues due to premature relationships BECAUSE they became dependent of another person assuring them they were of a certain standard and without that person they don’t know exactly who they are as an individual.

Individuality is 1a. Total character peculiar to and distinguishing an individual from others. b) personality

When I say “relationships” I’m not only speaking romantically, this also applies to the friendly. People have become accustom to trading the loyalty to themselves for popularity, how heart wrenching is that? To make up for that lack of self love they rather surround themselves around miscellaneous people instead figuring it out through the strength of themselves solely.

Being able to not depend on perfection for personal satisfaction did me a great justice. I know who I am without the persistent presence of particular individuals. Since I’m sure of myself, for the most part, no one can ever discredit me for being “bad” unless it is myself so I’ll never take offense to any opinionated nonsense about myself ever. I don’t find myself questioning my existence because I fully aware of who I’ll always be, or am becoming.

I figure the folks who still feel lonely even with a person or group are still oblivious to themselves so even though they’re around people… the people they choose to be around could possibly just be a poor choice in character. Yet who would necessarily know better if you don’t know what you desire for yourself, yourself.

Enjoying your alone time allows you to learn about yourself. Only making it easier for you to grasp what you deserve from people. Right now I’ve noticed a great few standing for nothing; which happens to be them as an person lacking self love, meaning they lack a reason to be prideful. Which means they’ll also fall for anything; referring to letting people in your life who aren’t deserving of them.

After you go through this phase of trial and error while “finding yourself” you just learn to appreciate yourself more with reason besides what you do for others.

It’s not a bad thing to be alone for a period of time, I feel like everyone should enjoy the time to themselves. People don’t really know how to appreciate their alone time without having a pity party with themselves because being alone is looked at as something being wrong, it’s nothing wrong with being or becoming back in tune with yourself.

Sidenote: Stop doing stuff for people and expecting them to like, admire, or love you for it so it can justify you being a good person. For one nobody cares unless they want to and secondly you do nice things because it’s good to be a kind person NOT for notoriety.

Wishing Peace, Joy, Prosperity, or whatever your in need of at this time to all of you.

xoxo

Enjoy this song + visual “Loner” by Kali Uchis

“What do you see when you see me?”

Before we start here’s some food for thought, Black Michael Jackson.. and White Michael Jackson were definitely conspiracy theories.

I am more than sure everybody wonders how they are perceived by “the people” whether you care or not, it’s a thought.

I’d say 70+ percent of those people are thinking appearance wise while the other percentile wonders “WHAT MAKES A PERSON NOT BELIEVE IN ME??? HOW DID I PRESENT MYSELF FOR A PERSON TO THINK I’M DUMB?”

This refers to any instance. (It often happens to me with friendships in particular.)

In my case I wonder why people insult my intelligence, question my character, or just do not believe in my capabilities of being a honest person generally.

I think people go out of their way to not pay attention to another persons sincerity. Or maybe they are just truly oblivious to the experiences.

I’ve also developed an understanding that not every one can reciprocate the love they are given because they aren’t use to it. So can I blame them for treating me the only way they know how to treat people? It’s a tough decision to decide if you’re willing to make it your “job” to prove yourself to people in honor of defending yourself when realistically they probably don’t even care. They’ve become accustom to how they’re living, how people treat them. In a way I feel bad for people who adjust to being treated so crappy, they can’t enjoy the people who see so much more in them than they see in themselves.

At the same time I’m also very aware of Sensibility and it is hard to believe some people do not posses the ability to use it one bit. It’s there regardless if you choose to not display emotion externally…it’s there.

Hopefully people start picking up on the sincerity of a person so the giver doesn’t become tired,discouraged, or just choose to change their demeanor in all.

Take pleasure in a persons care for you whether it lasts forever for not! Don’t let that kind of energy go to waste.

Experiences will either create a new person or new perspective.. not always for the greater good either.

Wishing everyone Peace, Joy, and Prosperity xoxo.

Featured Song: Brent Faiyaz – Insecure

Friends

I was never fond of the whole “Birds of a Feather Flock Together” theory because mentally I knew even though I was hanging out with these particular people it was a disconnect intellectually (especially as I got to know them) therefore they’d never be able to relate, to me in general. The relation between such individuals and I were never, um, similar for me to feel like I’d want to be like/do as them SINCERELY. So the “flocking together part…was irrelevant. Let alone my high regards of what being a friend actually meant to me.

It irritates me how passively the word friend is tossed around so frivolously. It has loss a lot of feeling, what is a “friend”? Friendships kind of carry a negative connotation only because the betrayal is easier to publicize since everybody can relate to it, unfortunately.

I still don’t know if I take my friendships so seriously because they fill the void of not having a connection with my relatives.. and if that is really the case maybe I shouldn’t apply such pressure, pressure as in they should do any wrong to me.. EVER. Then again my personal family conflictions really have nothing to do with a person that was initially a stranger treating me “better” in many aspects than my own biological relatives will. I respect that and it will always have my high regards so I’m for certain they can do better than what they might do that would cause a conflict between our friends, if you catch my drift.

Now that I am “of age” I’m what you can say proud… that the people I surround myself with think as highly of me as I think of them. I’m lucky for many reasons but what I don’t acknowledge often are my friendships, I know some of the coolest people from having talents to great personalities. My friendships revolve around kind things resembling Fondness, Support, Honesty, and Loyalty. Not everyone gets to develop those kind of bonds with people and keep them on going as years progress.

So basically what I’m getting at is The Birds I’m flocking these days I’m very fond of. I’ve gotten to know with some of the kindest people spirits.

It makes me wonder if it’s not the lack of family or maybe its how I carry myself. I believe you are what you attract applies to many things and… if I am able to attract people who have such unique characteristics I’m something special because these people are extremely special to me. It helps a lot knowing you have people that look forward to you regardless of how you feel about yourself independently, I feel like people don’t value that kind of flattery.

I feel like the word “Friend” which is a noun meaning 1. A person whom one knows and with whom one has a BOND of mutual affection, ~~typically exclusive of sexual or family relations~~. is used where the word “Acquaintance”, which is a noun meaning 1. A person’s knowledge or experience of something. 2. A person one knows SLIGHTLY but who is not a CLOSE friend, often fits.

Big Ups to my friends for supporting me as a whole from every idea I have to my lifestyle choices. You learn things such as forgiveness, rationality, or how to deal with sensitivity from different perspectives and I’m very thankful for that.

Side note: Don’t be afraid to let your friends know you love them and shit sometimes.

The featured photo is from the sitcom “Friends”

!Wishing everyone Peace, Joy, and Porosity always XOXO!

Surprise Song, Enjoy It

Risk

Post 16

Now before I get started understand I’m willing to receive a lot of hate in order to defend what I’m fond of , respect me for it ! At least I’ll burn with integrity.

Something that truly irritates me is the fact you have to choose self respect verses you’re success these days, you can’t just live your life accordingly without risking your livelihood. We as people have independent morals, beliefs, and senses that we stand by but we must tone it down in order to make sure we don’t ruin ourselves because people don’t know how to allow more than one perception of an individual to flourish.

No, This doesn’t include the derogatory mess some of you refer to as ‘opinions’ regarding race, sexuality, & sexism among other things that don’t even effect you personally but consider to speak out the ass about so, don’t quote me in reference to such confusion considered a ‘moral’, ‘belief’, or ‘sense’.

I’ve always had that “you’re weird.” ‘Problem’ to be frank I still do and it’s so hard to disregard honestly. Only because it’s portrayed that being this extraordinary individual isn’t comforting to others so it isn’t likable since it lacks the norm, From my perspective I don’t get why your incomparable flow couldn’t awaken the minds of others that in fact you can be.. Different! Just like being told “you’re pretty” or any compliment you hold onto it, the same rules apply to the negativity especially when you’re building yourself up to help you evolve and although being “weird” isn’t something necessarily negative it’s also not something to be fond about. It makes you second guess yourself and it makes you live within a box that doesn’t let satisfy your urge to free yourself.

What I wonder is why people pressure others to continue to not be ‘unhappy’ by not respecting them express themselves while they know how it feels to stay secret.

I don’t think people realize It’s a lack of respect for Originality these days. It’s okay to put out whatever as long as the people like you. “Be something others can relate to.” As if that’s impossible to do just because something is abnormal a mass amount of people aren’t accepting of what’s ‘irregular’. To me if you, being you is relatable to one let alone a few then it will encourage many to take pride in any and everything regarding them.

Looking back, personally, I’ve sold myself short many times when it comes to self expression for the sake of people to like me. People who didn’t even pay attention to the fact I was like them after I purposely dedicated time to their acceptance. As a kid, teenager, young creative you are not aware that a person should like you because you are you and not who you should be. That’s as far as it should go though, once we reach a fine moment in adulthood we must start embracing and living for ourselves.

“Confinement“, a word developed from the root word “confine” which is a noun that means “the borders or boundaries of a place, especially regard to their restricting freedom of movement”

The featured photo is from the Bad Boy Record label Photo shoot showcasing the release of Craig Mack & Notorious B.I.G new music incorporating the infamous McDonald’s Big Mac.

Crazy Like That Glue – Craig Mack Documentary

Surprise Song, Enjoy it

Time is a terrible thing to waste.

post 15

Now before I get started understand I’m willing to receive a lot of hate in order to defend what I’m fond of, respect me for it! At least I’ll burn with integrity.

We have this weird obsession with blaming time on why we’re miserable even if its temporary. “Time” what is time? Have you seen “In Time” starring Justin Timberlake? Great movie if you haven’t.

TIME is a noun meaning 1. The indefinite continued progress of existence and events in the past, present, and future regarded as a whole.2.A point of time as measured in hours and minutes past midnight or noon.

People trap themselves in all aspects of life when they think time has a lot to do with things that have no actual deadline.

Everyone likes to blame the reason they are in a you could say non beneficial relationship on “time”. An Excuse to remain in distress is ” I’ve invested to much time.” even though I understand I don’t think people understand as much time as they’ve invested they have wasted. The point emphasized is that they don’t have time to waste yet remain in a stagnant relationship with no growth, which sounds like a waste of time to me.

Career wise we believe we’re running out of time only because we see it never stops so we must have it all together in a timely fashion instead of focusing on getting it done in general.

We don’t enjoy life to the fullest due to “time” we feel as if we must grow up at a certain speed instead of enjoying time as it progresses, we rush it. Isn’t it ironic we rush to grow up just to grow into feeling like were running out of time even when moving forward in a timely matter.

The only time we admire the beauty within time is when we’re getting off of work, waiting for that class to be over and living legends. People who stand for something wish to live on forever meaning the have outlived time because their words, paintings, music, or fashions continue to stay relevant after we’ve turned to dust.

Sam Is Dead w/ Visual – Odd Future

This cover was from the movie ” House Party 2″

Accept Accepting Acceptance

Hello! Good morning, afternoon, or evening.

As we prosper we learn to accept the fact that people can & will stress you out while adjusting to the thought that it’s nothing we can do about it. Some people will not see anything wrong with what they do until you choose not to deal with it and even still the problem will be with you and not themselves.

To start accepting the fact that some of the people you absolutely love can be horrendous to your lifestyle can be stressful especially when you have such an over abundance of appreciation for them. Just remember you can’t want to be in someone else’s life more than they want you in theirs themselves.

Acceptance is the finale when it comes to easy living. It’s a thing called good stress & bad stress! Bad stress is stress that doesn’t teach you a lesson to contribute to you not stressing again, while good stress helps you evolve correctly making you stronger in the process.

The cover is a photograph captured by John H. White in 1973 during the Bud Billiken Parade, Chicago.

What makes you, you.

TRIALS & TRIBULATIONS

Heartbreak
Betrayal
Love
Admiration
Joy
Family

Those are just a few examples of experiences you experience that help define who you become. It depends on how you took in what happened of course, two people can go through the same situation yet reflect differently from it. For many reasons such as how we are raised, what we’ve observed in an independent settings, and the influence of things around us while growing out also.

It’s alright to be negative I suppose, if that’s what helps you get through you’re days in a relatively “peaceful” way. That’s your form of Realism you live in state of harsh truth. It doesn’t mean that you aren’t okay yourself you’re just aware of how ugly things can get so you try not to venture far from that kind of reality. Some people just happen to have horrible souls instilled within them, this doesn’t apply to them. Just avoid accidentally turning into what caused you pain/grief out of spite .
“The bright side is…” it’s always a brighter side to things because everything is a butterfly effect so without one thing happening another opportunity wouldn’t have came about even if that’s just the truth. Nothing is as disappointing as it seems because when it’s great sometimes it’s not that good and when it’s bad sometimes it’s not that horrible just… inconvenient at the time. You become understanding of that as time progresses and become more accepting since you’ve overcame particular circumstances.
Tranquillity, some people just live in the moment then determine their demeanor. You take what’s around you and incorporate it into your life the best way that fits to bring you solidarity because of that your not happy nor sad, you’re just living. What comes with that is a lack of feelings, to others that is, because you know. You know that without the display of feelings it’s easier to live without worry.

You can’t judge how anyone decides to heal throughout life. You can only work with them and make sure they keep their head strong instead of tearing them down because you don’t like what you see or hear. Everyone has a back story and depending on circumstances it’ll determine their outlook on life. Some do things unconsciously because that’s just what they’re use to. Everything is a Learning experience, dealing with different people teaches you how to deal with many people as you move on with life.

What people don’t tell you about loving yourself.

My biggest fear is to love someone more than I love myself.

Once you adapt to loving yourself unconditionally you fall deeply in love with who you are. Even though that might just sound like the life to live you don’t realize how much of a box you place yourself in! You feel like people can never give you the love you give yourself, so what do you need them for? Which is extremely sensible but the unfortunate part is you cut developing a bond people short without knowing a potential outcome. You feel like “If you cause me stress I don’t cause myself why would I want you in my life.” I’ve come to grips with acknowledging how unrealistic that mind frame is due to the fact every relationship has its cloudy days. Yet and still, I’ll live.

When you love yourself you don’t look for validation of yourself in others! You aren’t exactly what people would call self-centered but you know what works for you and how your vibe flows. I’m not saying you feel like you’re better than the next person, it’s just all about self-respect. So much time has been invested into yourself you don’t have time to waste on anything not contributing to the bettering of you.

After a while you become okay with the fact you might just be single for the rest of your life because its like you can finish living carelessly when it comes to another persons feelings. BUT at least you have yourself. Oppose to living life with the mind frame of “what if” or simply settling for less because that’s what’s around at the moment. If you stay true to yourself you’ll always have a piece of mind to hold when in distress, the opinion of yourself is not compromised because you are fully aware of the truth.

For as many pros it is it’s also cons and they are all developed psychologically because you love you. When you love yourself you become overprotective you constantly remind yourself how much you owe yourself to always stay true to your own decisions. You hope people understand where you’re coming from even though you don’t care because in your head you know what you mean, you see the potential within yourself. Under the circumstances of no one besides yourself is any change involved knowing change could be great only in the process of overtime growth oppose to someone demanding a change to benefit them.

Even though you know what’s wrong & what’s right your actions are souly to accommodate you & you become real unapologetic for it.