Lifestyle – Page 7 – LEARN AS YOU LIVE

To whom, to those, to all! For what!

Being “misunderstood” plus unwilling to compromise I wonder do I still serve my purpose. I believe I was created to rebuild the mind of! I’ll sacrifice myself on behalf of producing a new mind, outlook on life, anything. I’m willing to give since I know the take will forever stand in the way of your thoughts.

I don’t recommend this to everyone, I’m okay because I can rebuild myself, when I what you can say “destroy” myself in a sense. In this process I also learn the reasons and motives of others making me be more understanding overall therefore the next person I come across can also gain a new level of mental/emotional, understanding.

I’m not sure why I feel the need to make this my responsibility, I take that back. I do this because it’s a lack of open-mess worldwide so if I can stress the aspects of difference being perfectly fine it’s the least I can do. It’s a way of helping develop the process of “understanding” become easier.

Trial and error taught me most of, as in 60% including my mother & sister being open with their trial and errors to go off of boosting it to probably 87%, not everyone is able to make mistakes.. openly. Let alone be okay with making a mistake and having the time to actually learn something from it. So the fact I can take advantage of that on behalf of those not able to you begin to think of it like you’re just doing a favor.

Now The mind is so complex even when people “think” they’ve disregarded what I’ve done keyword being WILLINGLY they go back on it trying to make it not make sense… essentially just making it make sense but not admitting it.. or at least admitting it openly. Which is fine. I don’t do it for notoriety but I figured out the discrepancy on why some people don’t favor me.

& With all the good comes the bad.

Unfortunately my biggest pet peeve when doing all this is some people are just unperceptive and it’s sad. I understood it’s the concept of being guarded. Being so closed off in order to “protect” yourself can eventually be equivalent to looking out a window with your eyes closed. You miss out on everything and just reiterate the idea of being scared of… whatever. All this is fine by the way I’m not here to tell you it’s wrong but to STRESS you can use me, whether it be in secret, bi-weekly, everyday. As a bit of “guidance” in many aspects of life as I continue learning as I live.

& all this applies to anything. I’m speaking on behalf of dealing with others for the most part.

I wonder does all that get overshadowed because of who I am and how I choose to be…

Unapologeticness or Unapologeticmess

post 19

Now before I get started understand I’m willing to receive a lot of hate in order to defend what I’m fond of , respect me for it ! At least I’ll burn with integrity.

Am i sorry for how i feel? Probably not, it’s how i feel. I know that sound very selfish but I’ve learned how to accept it because other people speak how they feel and do what they desire to do while “I” as an individual take it upon myself NOT to get extremely upset with a person and their feelings, thoughts of life but just remove myself instead if necessary. We’re free people/individuals/different/one of one or at least I am.

essentially i believe if i can others can to so no matter what i do … say.. or portray myself shouldn’t have anything to do with you if you don’t incorporate yourself in it.

Conflicted because I don’t know if I’m defending the ones we consider dickheads but at the same time I feel as if “it is what it is” a wise one once said “If it wasn’t for Villains it would be no Heroes”

Growing up I either heard or read “stand up for what you believe in even if you’re standing alone” I decided to incorporate that into my moral compass, mind you goes it both ways for anyone opposing you but I also feel as if you can waste your time if the person isn’t willing to be wrong or whatever the case may be. I write and I usually write from a perspective that’s not really respected because we relate to ourselves and it makes me realize life is a big contradiction among itself. We make decisions based off circumstances which is probably why my character is always on my mind so I can always be assure I’m sticking to “one side” of things to not seem flip floppy when indeed, it is what it is.. That’s where the “MESS” comes in.

Getting older I’m noticing the same reason people love me, respecting the theory of principle; standing by my feelings or thoughts; protecting what means to me. Happens to be the same reason they hate me especially if it doesn’t apply to their lifestyle per say. People disregard the power of the mind when they are set in stone, all this applies to those who read this and go against me or use their unapologeticness for what they deem “good” when really it’s only good for them and those who relate (sounds familiar?).

I also understand that some people present very very “incorrect” opinions about life but at the same time I’m content being aware they feel as such to know to stay away from them.

If people didn’t voice their feelings as such we’d be blind to how people sincerely feel! Regardless of how it effects me emotionally I just have to understand how they think or what made them feel as such.

I’m one to also have conversations with those who oppose me to understand their p.o.v BUT! without the intentions of starting an argument.

Overall am I d*ckhead or? I mean I don’t publicly voice to a person or try not at least, voice that a persons opinions is causing them to be less of a person. I’m getting tired of apologizing about how I feel even though I watch people present their opinions as facts while I’m just stating my perception as an opinion. After all if we’re being as technical as we’re becoming your opinion might be a fact to YOU, according to you! Therefore my opinion is also a fact…because it’s true to me.

I’ll be sure to update you when I find a correct balance that’s morally correct, even though sometimes doing the right thing isn’t “Morally” correct let alone “Politically” correct.

P.S No this is not directed to give Nazis, Rapist, Homophones, or any other of that BULLSHIT! A self righteous pass, Matter of fact I don’t even know why you’re here.

XOXO – Wishing Peace! Joy! & Prosperity!

Words

“Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones, but WORDS are Psychological Wounds that never Heal” – Mr. Turner from The Fairly Odd Parents

I think words became important to me when I grasped the fact they can be sincerely hurtful, misunderstood, and people don’t realize the power they possess. So I took it upon myself to make it a point of being accountable and sincere regarding what comes from me.

You ever wonder why the most evil words resonate? You can be told the rudest maybe even not so true thing from someone that means something to you and it’ll just stick with you mentally regardless of the many kind things you hear about yourself as time progresses from different people.

Words are important because they are able to express how you FEEL I wish people paid attention to the power they have. It’s unbecoming of what words have transitioned to be, we get told things that hold lots of uncertainty depending on the individual. It’s like even though the words come from us, are a reflection of us! You’d think people would be more truthful so you know exactly what you’re dealing with. Instead we have people feeling the need to plot on you and make it a purpose to use their words for manipulation, for whatever reason, decreasing the shock value of “my word is bond.”

You have to worry about the manipulators in the word who sense great faith in you believing in them although they don’t mean what they say they’re fully aware that words INDEED speak louder than actions regardless of what anyone implies or would like to believe.

P.S No, this does not mean listen to the truth and switch it around to be able to be in denial on behalf of yourself to make someone eventually look like the bad guy.

No Title

I’m not forcing fandom onto anyone who couldn’t care less, I respect you.

I don’t completely know why I love, let alone how I do. As I write I realize I love because I know how it feels to not have, experience, or feel love and knowing my love can be for someone to have, experience, or feel warms my heart it really does. I also know my love isn’t distributed evenly I LOVE the misunderstood, the bad, the unorthodox which is what the world seems not to appreciate. Love is love to me it should be unconditional and I mean that with no guilt. I can learn from what a person deems as ” bad”.. I want to know why it’s so bad it doesn’t “deserve” love of any sort and that teaches me how to give it in many different circumstances because I can understand. As I write some more I realize knowing what I love, my emotions, the appreciation for my love can all get taken away brings me comfort since I’m use to disappearance. “Love” I always liked the idea of “Love” in all aspects of life but never took the time to live it..watching “love” during my years of growth I noticed people aren’t sincere with it and that brings the shock value down, if you aren’t sincere with it leave it alone. Being aware I’m putting something so pure into the universe unconditionally for others at the sake of myself ,sometimes, leaves me satisfied. Which sums it all up as “I love because it can bring me pain I use as growth to become better; newer while knowing someone took what I willingly gave does something for me”. I love because truthfully love can be so Painful but having the power to know I also won’t become a victim of it if I do not see the purpose in doing so keeps me aware I’m in control of me.

It’s easy. To easy. It’s convenient, It captures authentic anger, It’s an easy way for me to express I feel disrespected. It can sometimes be a natural reaction, It’s easy… It’s … convenient.

I stress I was on the fence about being a fan of “XXXTENTACION” being a person that separates artist from art… their art is how they release themselves, I can’t really take that from someone, I couldn’t find myself to stop listening to his music. After I found out he was an Aquarius, born a day after me, I took the time to really go back and learn about the young man the best I could. Which gave me a lot of clarity on his actions, he was vocal about how his mind worked, and he had pride..therefore I found myself “understanding him instead of making judgement” and I don’t regret that.

When I first watched the video I watched it just to see this young man, then I watched it again to really watch it, then I watched it again because I couldn’t answer these question honestly in my own head..which is where I should be the most comfortable, then I watched it again to finish assuring I comprehended it , then I watched it again to make sure I saw what I seen and comprehended what I understood, and I did all this crying because I felt bad for myself and him. Jahseh, X, was able to capture the dark truth which is something I more than appreciate and it encouraged/encourages me to be honest. We all go through trials and people try to sugar coat their vices to avoid embarrassment and critique and sometimes that’s what we need. It took his mistakes to be publicized and him to be crucified for him to really understand that he might not have understood. Mass majority of the world didn’t acknowledge that, mass majority of the world does not look at anything as a butterfly effect as in; because of this it’s that; because of that there is this .. and that is like that because possibly! It’s more than one way to live, learn, and grow. His growth was cut short and it bothers me, honestly, I know I went thru different levels of growth, anger, isolation to be who I am right now & I’m not done. So to see his effort went unappreciated to some, many, which I can’t imagine how discouraging that could be because 1 single person can mess us up mentally and slow you down. Picture thousands if not millions of people reminding you that you can’t become better to assure the same mistakes stop reoccurring while trying to become the person they want you to be. All of this ties into me because I can relate to the theory of growing and becoming in touch with new perspectives and I had to learn that not everyone grows at the same time and if you arent willing to help someone who is willing to help themselves then you contribute to the problem.. XXXTENTACTION death showed me everyone has deep-rooted hate in them, well solidified the idea, and I’m here walking among these same people trying to assure myself it’s nothing wrong with me for being able to speak on MYSELF truthfully regarding the good, bad, and ugly while people are in denial about their own truths.

I’m not forcing fandom onto anyone who can couldn’t care less, I respect you I’m just displaying how I learn as I live.

I’d love to know why you love and why you hate. You can message me personally or comment

XOXO

LONG LIVE XXXTENTACION MAY HE REST IN PEACE

Embracing Yourself, Learning Yourself

I really do not have “advice” at this time just perspective

I’m doing what I do to the best I can.

I love myself, I’m not completely sure why yet, like I’m aware of my wonderful character.

Am I sure truly sure of myself?

Am I sincerely embracing myself If I’m still worried about how others, will, perceive me?

I wouldn’t say I second guess myself for validation from others but for their comfort. Whenever

I consider “what if they don’t like me?” often enough to reconsider how I express myself, how I go about my appearance, or even just reconsidering my choices for the comfort of others. I’ve noticed that no one ever notices or says thank you. “Thank you for restructuring yourself to make sure i’m comfortable even though you might not be.” Conflicted often because I don’t necessarily care about how a person perceives me, especially if they don’t ask clarifying questions straight from the source(me), but also realizing maybe I care to much about myself caring about if I care about how a person perceives me at all. Maybe the problem is people don’t see me how I see myself and that’s deeper than any appearance discrepancy. They don’t see what I have to offer to the world as an individual & the fact how I choose to present myself for myself can detour what others think of me might actually be what bothers me. Single handed appearance and character are intertwined invalidly because you look like “this” you must feel as “that” and that’s usually never the case. It bothers me that a person might not give me a chance regarding anything because I might not meet their idea of attractiveness or express myself through my appearance correctly to them. It’s hard finding balance for something you don’t even feel the need to balance. It’s even harder having to always prove yourself that you are what you know you are but people just refuse to see it.

My overall conclusion is I just have to steady remind myself that not everybody is going to like all aspects of me and that’s fine. Those who don’t but still desire to see the good in me I’ll always appreciate. Those who love me unconditionally forever I love back but regardless of any feelings towards me I must stay true to me.

Now I’m living.

We know what’s wrong but can what’s wrong be also what’s right

We admire the idea of transparency, thinking that someone could be braver than we ever found the courage to be brings us a form of joy. What we don’t like is being uncomfortable or adjusting to the idea of someone else in order to get to understand them better.

Lets establish that we all come from different backgrounds and live differently when it comes to the details of life because of perspective we must understand it’s more than one way of thinking for reasoning. I figured POC specifically have this narrative of we all think as minorities. Not to disregard the importance of blossoming on a higher level mentally we just don’t accept every level of growth because in some world all minorities live from the same common law.

“I dissuade Party members from putting down people who do not understand. Even people who are unenlightened and seemingly bourgeois should be answered in a polite way. Things should be explained to them as fully as possible. I was turned off by a person who did not want to talk to me because I was not important enough. Maurice just wanted to preach to the converted, who already agreed with him. I try to be cordial, because that way you win people over. You cannot win them over by drawing the line of demarcation, saying you are on this side and I am on the other; that shows a lack of consciousness. After the Black Panther Party was formed, I nearly fell into this error. I could not understand why people were blind to what I saw so clearly. Then I realized that their understanding had to be developed.”

-Huey Newton

Do we actually appreciate honesty?

Everyone is pressured over Kanye West thoughts, he was being honest. Don’t we appreciate and value honesty? Often I hear “be straight up” unfortunately when that may be the case but it’s not your type of truth you’re not as accepting. Stop devoting all your feelings towards what people say and give thanks to the fact they said it. Does it not concern most of you that it’s people who save face for the acceptance of the world but think indeed those ill thoughts. That’s so fraudulent, I’d rather know someone’s true feelings and not feed me … lies, that way I know where I stand, how to move forward WITHOUT over acknowledging what I can’t seem to grasp or agree with. People dedicate so much time to making sure “we” feel stupid for not being politically correct when its legitimately deeper than that.

Rarely can, let alone does, someone explain why our comments, questions, and concerns are wrong backed up with more than the justification of “that’s just what it is”, “it’s morally correct”, I emphasize people forget the fact we are individuals and perceive the world differently. The thing that gets me the most is so many barriers have been broken and elevated on behalf of someone thinking differently AND wore their thoughts on their sleeves, just love us, the hate is not going to move you forward. Not to mention those with alternative thinking are often willing to listen to learn new ways of thinking to gain understanding.

P.S. No this isn’t defending stupidity. It’s a difference between stupidity and ignorance, go look the difference. It’s okay to be opinionated, of course, just don’t belittle someone else as justification. You back up your opinions with your theories, relations, and personal backgrounds, if you can’t relate don’t hate.

Unconventional Beauty, a blessing and a curse.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.. if that happens to be the case does “If you’re ugly on the inside you’re ugly on the outside” hold significance still?

What is unconventional beauty? “Someone who is unconventionally beautiful is attractive through their defiance of standards, not in spite of them. A trait that is ugly to one person may seem beautiful to another. There are those who are only beautiful in the eyes of certain beholders. What’s universal is the attitude behind the facade.” –Urbanette Magazine

Evening-Standard-Magazine-Slick-Woods-David-Roemer-13 — Slick Woods photo by David Roemer

Unconventional Beauty!

Being told our features are strong, being mistaken for a man, or being compared to an animal is something we are to familiar with in this realm of beauty.

catwalk_yourself_grace_jones — Grace Jones photo by Universal / The Kobal Collection

The Curse: It’s a lot of grief that’s placed upon you, people just rule themselves high enough to determine whatever about you based off your beauty. Growing up you don’t find yourself to be as beautiful as you happen to be and being teased about what will eventually become insecurities do not make it any better. I use the word “curse” with all sarcasm. It’s like we must prove we are of some substance since we aren’t whats generally welcomed.

The Blessing: Our true beauty gets the chance to be admired wholeheartedly. Your urge to display Creativity increases only causing you to become better; innovated; free-flowing for it will be accepted more openly because you’re “abnormal”, I use that term very loosely, already. Luckily we get to get our point across and really heard out because the people around us aren’t necessarily for any gain besides what we have to offer as a human being.

Teyana+Taylor+GCDS+Runway+September+2017+New+MFgH2YAixDAl — Teyana Taylor photo by Albert Urso

Learning to “adjust” or understand that you have different type of facial features can be a journey especially in such a vain era we happen to be living in.

Self Confidence: Self expression gives me a boost of confidence sometimes I feel I do not look like what society wants let alone my best. With great feeling energy your mood will make you feel invisible in a sense contributing to what an outsider would consider self confidence not knowing you basically had to throw a pep rally while getting ready just for mild assurance. As time progresses you just learn to wear the skin you’re in effortlessly. It gets tough sometimes tougher in different moments because

When you see other women who are given a hard time yet still vibrant in the mind and soul it speaks volumes on how senile the vision of the world can be, as people still contribute to tearing down the persons confidence. I encourage every beaut to embrace what they have it’s people out her that would love to have a look that stands out.

Also as I’ve gotten older I don’t get bothered over snide comments since so many see a different kind of beauty within me. Yet it still makes me wonder why some people feel the need to go out of their way to make me aware of however they feel about my physical appearance from something such as the size of your ears to the skinniness of our bods enjoy what you have to offer to the world.

FKA TWIGS photo by Jamie James Medina

Bella Hadid Michael Kors s/s 2018

Solange Knowles

Issa Lish

Julia Zimmer

Alek Wek

*Just a light take on my thoughts regarding how it feels to be placed in an almost secondary realm in the world of beauty.*

The Bleu Face Company

Processed with VSCO with fs4 preset — IG: @babybottle.dad

“The Bleu Face Company” I’m intrigued by the concept of it. “Why are the face bleued?”, “Why is it so calming in a since?” The tranquility of the clothing shows creativity and gives you the ability to imagine almost. Although I didn’t ask those questions in particular I just wanted to showcase not only the brand but the general “feelings” or the mind of the creator.

The Bleu Face Company Website

What is you’re favorite part of designing? Also do you remember when you had your first vision encouraging you to start designing?

“My favorite part of designing is the process of creating honestly, just watching things go from point A to B to D (which is the final outcome). I got my first vision for designing from supporting an upcoming designer for the first time, ordered a shirt, got it, then just knew I could do the same.”

2. How would you define fashion?

“I define fashion as Art. I feel like anything you’re creating in and bringing creation to life is Art, I feel like Art cannot fail when you put God first, and really work & research .”

3. When getting dressed for any specific occasion or everyday life what makes or breaks your outfit?

“Honestly, My hat… it just completes me. I can’t remember the last time I left the house hat-less.”

IG: @Kommanderkofo & @Luhjulietsavagewizza

4. What’s your favorite designer/brand? If it influences you explain how.

“My favorite designer is Virgil Abloh and honestly I don’t have a favorite designer brand, they’re all equally hard (Great) in their own way to me whether it be their marketing or the actual product.

5. Name a weakness you have?

“My weakness, I don’t really know, I know I’m indecisive but most times that ends up saving the day and/or bettering the results.”

6. What does your fashions symbolize?

“Fashion symbolizes ART & CREATION to me.”

7. How’s your support system personally involving family and friends? Do they have faith in you? Do they not acknowledge you? Do you find people asking you for free handouts? What’s the most irritating thing you’ve experienced?

“For me its all love. No one is going to have as much faith in you as God does so you can’t really be mad at any negativity that comes your way on the come up. You Just have to stay prayed up, stay focused & keep pushing, let God’s work talk. No need to explain yourself to anyone because they’ll only actions & results.”

Name: Mr. Bleu Face
From: Based out of Atlanta
Dream Occupation: The Bleu Face Company
Favorite era: Anything before my time except slavery. I love vintage-ness.
Unpopular Opinion: I didn’t do any of this. This is all the Lord’s doing.

IG:FaceBleu
Twitter: FaceBleu